Checking In

I have forgotten about my blog because the days are so smooth and
relaxing. I am really settled into life here. Just enjoying the days
going by and each moment. The amazing sun and breeze, the birds and
people, the colors and flavors. I have chai down now and went today and
bought spices to bring home. The next retreat women arrive this coming
sunday, there are just two of them. We have been talking about the
schedule and their arrival but really we wont spring into action until a
day or two before.



I put together a video of photos
and videos for the women from the last retreat to have a nice memory. I
am going to work on a video for marketing the retreat.

Plans

      I just finished a delicious mug of chai that i made myself. The tea i used may have been green, it was not exactly tasting like the chai i would have from the cart but it was darn good nonetheless. Chai is really just a handful of certain spices in various combinations i have come to realize, you cant go wrong. Deborah equated it to moms mashed potato's. Whatever recipe mom used is the best one. So far all the flavors of chai at all the different places ive had it have been varied.
      This morning i woke up fast and clear and i went for a run. I thought i wouldn't feel safe going out by myself so i havn't been running while i am here. Of course i felt completely safe and the people on the street and in the beautiful walking park where i went to run, all were out getting their exercise as well. It was a wonderful way to start the day. Several times i was joined by some street dogs who ran along with me for a bit, one jumped on me and i felt proud that i could pack talk him to knock it off. I speak dog. I miss elphaba. and her fuzzy little head and her endless unconditional love.
     I have a lovely plan for sometime after i get back to have a get together at my place with all my friends and i will cook some indian dishes and have chai and everyone will get all the gifts i picked out for them. And i will get to see everyone that i love who i missed while i was gone.
     Thursday is massage day! I am so spoiled. And tomorrow i have another acupuncture treatment. I finished my book about the PCT and i am going to take it down to the used book shop and trade it out for something. The woman there, Sophia is interesting to talk to but very chatty so one would have to be in the mood for that.
    I called the Massage school and they did indeed have room for me to start the program so i am enrolling through email and putting down a deposit and classes start just a few days after i get home. So it's full speed ahead! I am ready.

    Its beautiful and breezy today and i am going up on the terrace to play my guitar while Deborah has her massage.

my Kunchok and my Deborah saying farewell for now

 

After a meal you are given a little bowl of hot water 

with a slice of lemon for cleaning up your hands

                                 I picked red roses to have in my room.
We always have fresh and beautiful flowers all over the house.

a broken neck

         So much to be excited about! I had forgotten about all the plans ive had about turning 30. Sitting here in India it's pretty awesome to have done this as part of that milestone already. I would very much love to take a backpacking trip and ive been reading a book about a woman who hiked the PCT which is the west coast equivalent of the Appalachian trail. I want to travel through the west coast states and experience them. That is on my list. I am not so sure that i want that experience to be on foot. Especially because ive never been backpacking before.  I think it would be amazing to hike the Long Trail in Vermont from early -mid September. I think that would be just as challenging but because its in Vermont it seems doubly rewarding.
         I am considering for the first time ever, not going to Michfest this year. Partly because i am not sure if i want to work it, have a craft booth or just go as a festie. None of the options are particularly calling to me right now so i am just setting that decision aside for now. Up front and center is my desire to get into a massage program ASAP so i can get started building my practice in Texas. One program starts two days after i get back from India. I have yet to call and see if they have an opening. It would wrap up in october. I think i can swing it in all aspects, and if i cant- at least i tried! I will give them a call. SO many exciting things!
       
              I think  i mentioned that my sweet little guitar Luna broke her neck on the flight over here. Sad times. But, Mr Shak took what was left of her to the old market and so something no doubt will become of her. Yesterday Deborah and i went to check out a music store and there was a bright blue guitar with my name all over it. They installed a pickup for me in it as well. And it was all less than 100 dollars. Crazy. Ive been playing all night and am very happy to have it. Mr Shak is going to see if he can bring the strings from Luna to me if they are still there. Im happy.

      Deborah and i are having such a nice time enjoying ourselves and the days as they pass. Its so peaceful and beautiful here and calming. Its like a dream sometimes. I am spending my days fully submersed in the moment which is anywhere from having a deep intellectual conversation to taking a nap on the terrace in the sun. The ease. That is what strikes me. The ease of life when you choose to be in the moment. i know it will be a challenge to bring this home with me, but i have faith that i am up for it.

                               Luna's fatal wound

 The new guitar.

   some of my treasures from juna bazaar

 

White cat, red apples

Today was a pretty darn good day. We went to Juna Bazaar which I was really looking forward to going and being able to poke around without the womens. That's what mr shak called the group. The womens.
Deborah and I spent a couple of hours shopping and haggling for brass and things. I found such treasures! I am going back for sure. I could spend hours there. I'm not joking. It's a gritty flea market in the slums. Both times I've gone I havnt taken many photos because there is just too much going on.  Next time I go I will try to get some of it captured. Afterward we went to lunch and then home. I lounged on the terrace in the sun and read some of my book. I've been reading books on meditation, Buddhism, awareness, breath... Of course Deborah has a gigantic library of this stuff. I am getting a lot and metabolizing it as well.

 Last night I had a dream that I was running away from whatever was chasing me and to escape I turned myself into a white cat and I climbed up a tree. No one could see me or knew I was there. Then I saw my friends pass by me under the tree so I came down and was myself again but we were still being chased. When we got caught, it was four boys and they cornered us next to a pile of red apples which we then threw at them as hard as we could. I looked up what the cat and apples mean and it was fascinating. The cat is an illusion that you believe but can't see that it's not real. and the apples are acknowledging that something is wrong and you want to make it right. Deborah and I talked about the dream. To me it's pretty clearly that the illusion i have is that I can choose to be seen or not, found. I wasn't afraid being chased. And the apples. Throwing them at the people who had been chasing us. I take it to mean that I recognize the illusion I have and I don't want to have it any longer. I want to believe that people see my true nature without me having to effort it to them. I have been doing some research with my dreams while I'm here and I have been doing some exercises and techniques to develop my lucid dreaming ability. Going to bed is exciting again.
I was sitting up on the terrace the other day and I had a little epiphany about this year being the ten year anniversary of when I woke up and started really coming into awareness and consciousness. That's what it feels like here, I am so purely joyful and happy here and so clear in my understanding. It's like waking up on a deeper level. It's so satisfying and revealing. Feels like using a fine brush to uncover the ancient carvings after all the top soil has been shoveled away.  

Happy Birthday!!!

                      Happy Birthday Levi!!

                                                                     XOXO

squeeze

Good Morning,

      I am having my morning coffee and listening to the birds and thinking about what to do today. Its pretty amazing to sit here in the morning in this place so full of colors and life and just decide what i feel like doing. I could go out and walk and shop and meet people, i could go to the art supply store and walk up and down the isles and pick out treasures and come home and create something. I could practice doing some henna, i could draw for my screenprinting, i could finish my fantastic book about the PCT which makes me want to hike all summer long. It's kind of how i feel about life right now. Endless options to do so many things that i feel excited about. Its a pretty awesome place to be in. i feel grateful and in balance with being present while here and also with going home when that time comes. I have almost been here one month! I have things to look forward to that i want to get started and i know that i will come back here next year. Without a doubt i will be back.

----- Evening----

Deborah and i each made a phone call in the morning and then we had a yoga practice and then i went to Dr Passangs for my second treatment of acupuncture. This time he put needles below my knees and by my elbows, across my belly, between my eyebrows and between my big toes. Then he had me turn over and he put two on either side of my spine. It felt the same, energy moving and things shifting. As i lay there i let myself go as blank and still as i can and i focus on taking deep controlled breathes and just let whatever comes up come. I am curious about this anger and i did some talking and asking for it to move and to let it go. It feels like something that is stored that is really old and some of it feels kind of fresh. Its coming to the surface and i am understanding and feeling where it comes from and why i have it. I feel grateful. I want to work with what is coming up, i want to look at it and acknowledge it and then find my peace with it and let it go. Its good work and i am happy to have my awareness there.

when i got back Deborah and i took a little adventure into downtown Pune to walk around a bit. we looked in on shops and talked to people and i took some pictures and videos. We went into this one little furniture place where a young man was working and we were just looking around. On the way out to leave the young man reached out and took my hand and shook it smiling, then he leaned forward and hugged me and as he hugged me he put a hand between us and gave my boob a nice squeeze. HA! I thought that was hilarious. He was probably around 16. I didnt feel even slightly offended, its hard to explain but it was clearly not that big a deal to either of us. It just was.

We took a ride back home and the ayas were still cleaning so we escaped to my room and watched a movie which i really really loved called Moonrise Kingdom. And now we are enjoying the last of the light. I think i will walk down to the place Kunchok and i always went for chai and have some. Its been a few days. I want to learn how to make my own for when i come back.

                               These street kids followed us all day, even after we gave them rupees

                                                     This happened on our rick ride home

 

 

this is why i drink my coffee black now. milk in a bag.

  

new ink and ideas

Oh i do love getting a tattoo!! This one was my longest sitting yet. It took just under 5 hours because i decided (with kunchoks wise advice) that maybe i didn't want all the lines filled in with black. So I was directing him to change things and add black and thicken lines. It was so much fun! And i absolutely love the finished work.
       Today we sent kunchok off on his train back home. Deborah took a long walk around the neighborhood and then had a quiet afternoon. I did some writing and i started working on a few projects for the retreat. Tomorrow we are going to do a yoga practice on the terrace. Im looking forward to that. I also have more acupuncture in the morning and i am really looking forward to that! I am going to stop eating wheat again. i did have one delicious biscuit called a rescue biscuit thats made from wheat germ and tastes like something from my childhood that i cant put my finger on.
       I took a walk today and had a chai by myself and read some of my book. the street woman who always comes up to Deborah found me. She always has a little child with her since it helps her get handouts. Today it really upset me because she was asking for money and the little three year old girl saw my water bottle and started really begging for it. That was hard. I let her drink from it and she was clearly incredibly thirsty so i bought her a coconut as well. A man sells them from a cart here and cuts them open with a machete. Today it was just a lot to witness. Im sure shes feeding her kids, im sure she grew up that way and its just how life is. I dont judge her for it at all. Survival is survival. What is so hard is that this little girl doesn't have a shot at a different life. Not here. India is different like that. you stay where you are born. So im pretty sure i should move to India and take this baby with me.